Is this an ex-cop writing or a hieromonk, I kept asking myself as I read Fr Peter Wheeler's Letter, received on August 8, 2005?
EXPOSING ABP GREGORY - V
"PRIEST MONK FR PETER WHEELER JUSTIFIES CALLING IN THE POLICE AND PUTTING ME IN JAIL:"
"Dear Nathaniel,
God bless you.
Unless you end up leaving Archbishop Gregory's omophorion - which I hope you don't do, Nathaniel, because that would be a real shame. I'd hate to see you mess up your life like that. - at some point you will almost certainly come here for services, and we are going to have to talk, so this is a letter to break the ice somewhat.
+++An Ecclesiatical Court is the appropriate Canonical forum.
I don't like how things went down, and I'll be the first to admit that I did a lousy job of handling the entire situation. I'll even say that I regret calling the sheriff; but Nathaniel, I don't feel that I had any other choice. You're probably not going to agree with me about that, but I didn't feel that you left me with any other option. I've gone through the whole, lousy mess in my mind a million times, at least, and I still can't see that I had any other choice. I'm sorry, but I did what I felt I had to do.
+++You INDEED most certainly had "any other choice." As soon as you heard that I pleaded for Mother Mariam's intercesion and amnesty ON HER PROPERTY, why did you demand of the Police that they refuse my pleadings?
I don't like being in charge of people; but when I am placed in charge of a group of people - any group of people - there are certain duties and responsibilities that go along with that that I take very seriously. I will die to protect the safety and welfare of those people placed under me, regardless of who they are, or whether I even like them or not.
+++But why wouldn't die for your brother when you "pressed charges" against him for "stealing" the cassock he had been wearing for 1 & 1/2 years(as stated on the POLICE REPORT)?
When I am in charge of the monastery, I believe it is my responsibility to protect the peace, safety and welfare of the monastery, and most importantly, the people in it.
+++You sound more like the Security Police than a loving and protecting priest-monk.
That morning, you were a threat to the peace, safety and welfare of the monastery, and most importantly, the people in it. You may not normally be a physically violent person, but you were most definitely upsetting the peace of the monastery far in excess of what can be overlooked as simply warfare; and you were a threat to the safety and welfare of the souls of the other people in the monastery. That is evident in your trying to incite John to help you find canons to depose me.
+++How does asking John for Canons to support my case against you for abusing your priesthood threaten the safety of the monastery? Or did it threaten your ego? Our 'spat' was in private. John and Lazarus were still sleeping at 6:30 AM. I did not speak with them the entire week.
I was not going to allow you to continue to threaten the peace, safety and welfare of the monastery, and most importantly, the people in it. One of the things that makes Jerjis such a good doctor, and what makes his soul so precious, I think, is that it is completely engrained in him to always give of himself in caring for people who are suffering, no matter how much of a burden it places on him.
One of the things that is equally as much engrained in me is that the strong must protect those who cannot protect themselves. It is a fundamental part of who I am. I will die to protect anyone who I see threatened, including you. If I see someone threatened, and if there is any way that I can protect that person, I will take action. I don't care what the cost. If I can help that person, I will help them. If I can't do anything to help them, then I'll watch them die, or whatever, and take whatever action I can later.
+++I always believe that the fundamental part of who we are is: "Christ in us, the Hope of glory?"
You were a threat to the people in this monastery, and so I took action.
I did not act hastily. I tried to call Vladika, about fifteen or twenty times. I conferred briefly with John, and extensively with Lazarus. We all felt that we could not sit down together at breakfast and simply act as if nothing was wrong. We discussed the options we had, and I made the decision that I did.
+++If I was such a threat, why did you spend all that time 'protecting the monastery' from such dire danger: calling Vladyka 20 times, eating breakfast, discussing the options, while I was 1/8 of a mile away on Mother Mariam's doorstep at 7:30 AM?
I don't like that decision; but I don't feel that I had any other choice.
The whole issue of theft only came about because you would not return the monastery keys and credit card. If you go to work anywhere in the world, and they give you keys to their building, a company credit card, and uniforms, and you later decide to quit or are asked to leave, they are going to want those things back. It's their property, not yours.
+++So you compare Dormition Skete to General Motors?
Furthermore, no novice or monk owns ANYTHING. Period. All is held in common. It has always been like that from the beginning of monasticism. Why should you be any different? What makes you so special that only you own things, but none of the rest of us own anything? How could you possibly take a vow of poverty with that kind of mindset?
+++the Police Report stated that you affirmed that YOU owned my cassock.
Contrary to what you seem to think, I like you, Nathaniel. You probably won't believe this, until all is revealed at the Second Coming, but I don't think you will find anyone who has prayed for you as much as I have, with the possible exception of Jerjis. I prayed like you wouldn't believe that God would have mercy on you, and grant you Holy Baptism, and cleanse your sins, and move your heart to repent and become a monk and end your days with a good end in the blessed life of monasticism. And I have been praying for you through this mess, too.
+++Why wait for the Second Coming - You PUT ME IN JAIL on June 25, 2005. And ---Was this done by someone who likes me?
I miss you, Nathaniel. I don't miss living with you, and I don't miss the garbage you put us through. But I miss you.
+++Why then didn't you at least 'visit me', in prison, the least of the brethren, if you 'miss me' so much? Why did you do nothing to get me out of Jail? Is this 'missing me?' You sound like a drunkard who shouts to his bar-room fellow. "I like you but I can't stand you."
I truly hope and pray that you will get your head on straight, and learn to forgive, so that you someday can come back here, if nothing else, to visit and attend the divine services.
+++Matthew 18:15
But you have to repent, and you have to understand that we are all human,and we all make mistakes. And, from time to time, we are all going to do things that you won't like. That is part of living with people.
+++Matthew 5:23
If you think you are the only person who has ever been excommunicated for what you may think are unjust reasons, you need to think again. You'll be hard pressed to find anyone who has been in the monastic life that hasn't ever been excommunicated for unjust reasons.
+++Only in cultic-monasteries like Dormition Skete. Nowhere is this spoken of by St John the Ladder, The Conferences, The Paradise of the Fathers, The Little Philokalia, The Optina Elders - NOWHERE.
Priests and bishops, although we have been vouchsafed great grace, are still human. We still make mistakes. We still have our own opinions and life histories that sometimes influence our judgment in the execution of our priestly duties.
+++That is why the Holy Fathers handed down to the Church the many Canons, to prevent "own opinions," and "life histories" from making unchristian mistakes. Both you and your bishop only give lip-service to the canons. Start with I Corinthians 6: "Dare anyone of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust?"
We're still human, Nathaniel. Give us a break.
Give me a break, please.
I'm sorry this whole thing happened. But Nathaniel, you made it so much worse than it had to be that it is unbelievable.
So Nathaniel, please forgive me,
+++Please be specific: For "leaving you no other choice but to call in the Police?" That is all I hear you affirming, ad infinitum. You never once said, "Please forgive me for putting you in Jail."
and give me a break, and settle down about this whole thing, and get yourself in a space where you can make peace. Please. Don't let the devil win with this. He's the one that caused all this, and he's the one that keeps you from making peace. Learn to reject
your thoughts, and let's get on with life and put this mess behind us. Ok?
+++I decided to obey the Saviour who instructs us in the event of disputes between brothers, for he knows better than me and you and your bishop: Matthew 5:23; Matthew 18:15
I like you, Nathaniel.
+++could've fooled me.
I don't want to see you get messed up like this. Don't let the filthy, stinking demons win.
+++they won't if we have a Formal Ecclesiastical Court as both Mother Mariam and Sbn Jerjis insisted on.
Learn to forgive, please, and make peace.
+++IF we have a Formal Ecclesiastical Court as both Mother Mariam and Sbn Jerjis insisted on, not to mention the Master Himself.
With much love in Christ (and I mean that),
+++Your entire letter and actions which you still justify speaks otherwise.
Sbn Nathaniel Kapner
+Peter, hieromonk"
POST SCRIPT - Father Peter Wheeler continued to affirm that I "left him no other choice" but to call in the Police and have me jailed.
