I am nothing.

[Symeon]

I am nothing.

[尼古拉前执事]

Symeon, I am sorry to hear of your frustration and anger. May I just say a few words without going into the whole Archbishop Gregory thing? (Which I think in your position, it is best to follow the Synod's lead)

Jesus never promised us happiness or an easy time in this world.

An anathema is leaving people to the judgment of God, it is not a damnation of people. People darn themselves, Orthodoxy does not. Who is damned? We rightfully cannot declare one to be damned, and for those ignorant of the truth, perhaps God had the mercy on their souls that we pray for. It would not surprise me.

[Symeon]

I am nothing.

[Austin Doc]

Dear In Christ Symeon,

Code: Select all

    I totally understand your frustration.  I've been there myself, and have times questioned why I was in the Orthodox Chruch, because it seems there are all these scandals and road blocks.  I've seen the faith of people close to me falter as well.  It appears to be a religion of pharises, "kooks" full of judgementalism, rigid adherance to "rules" and canons -- with each group using canons to their own ends --, with endless schisms leaving us confused as to where the Truth really is.

(...or, on the other hand, you have the Ecumenists who trample on the Holiness of the Church without and remorse.)
I can't say I blame you. In fact, that is what I called "old calendarism" on another thread. However, all I can say is that we know the Grace of God is here in the Orthodox Church. What about the RC's the Anglican's, Copts....only God knows? Yet, the Church has been firm on those matters and has said where the Church is not, the Grace of God is not there, ie, referencing all the Councils.

Code: Select all

   I hope you can find peace.  My suggestion (I know you're not asking for this), but since I've been in your situation,  is to find a group of Orthodox who actually demonstrate Love and Charity.   They are there!

Avoid the ones who always have chaos and pride around them. You will know them by their works. Also, bear in mind that the Church will have sinners in it...and some of them in high positions as well.

Peace in Christ,
Nectarios

[Chrysostomos]

Symeon,

First off, thank you for your candor. It is truly refreshing to
see someone dealing with these issues and share on this
message board their feelings and concerns. You of course,
risk exposing yourself as someone who "doesn't have it
all together", as the "others" do. I have my own story to
share, but I will not bore you with the details. Suffice it to
say, that I did leave the Eastern Orthodox Faith for a period
of six years....this after being a Reader in the Church.
So, you can understand, that you will not receive any stones
from me in the challenges you express here on this board.
I came back to the Church, as I realized that the Eastern
Orthodox Faith is the True Faith. It is the ancestral religion
of us all, those who proclaim to be Christians. There is a
major difference in myself now, as compared to then.
Frankly, the things I have seen on this board, views expressed,
all in the name of "the truth", got me very riled, indignant,
frustration, and sorrowful. Why? Because I saw myself in
these very same people. I was them, still am in many ways,
maybe even worse.

One bit of solace for me has been the way of the Hesychast.
This is the path that I have chosen from now on. I am an
amateur of amateur's in regards to that path. I profess
no wisdom, can share none, am chief among sinners....
I left the Church. Understand that I was a Protestant,
then Orthodox, went back to being a Protestant,
therefore, all those here on this board,by that very fact,
are the better lot than I. I came back
as a prodical son, to which I am eternally grateful.

I will share this one thing with you to consider, that the
way of the Hesychast has been so very helpful, that I had
wished I had know before I left the church previously.

In the book, Monastic Wisdom, The Letters of Elder Joseph
the Hesychast, in the Prolegomena section, it states that for
those who choose this path: "The beginning of the path is
self-examination with a view to self-knowledge. "Know
Thyself". The first and foremost step that one must take
is to "know oneself". That is, to know who you really are in
truth, and not what you imagine you are. With this
knowledge you become the wisest man. With this awareness,
you reach humility and receive grace from the Lord.
However, if you don't obtain self-knowledge, but consider only
your toil, know that you will always remain far from the
path. Knowing yourself consists in knowing "your weaknesses,
passions, and shortcomings".

The paragraph above expresses for me, the essence of what
I now strive for. My "mindset" is completely different than
when I was in the Church before. You see, I returned to the
OCA Church, from which I abandon in my previous years gone
by. Admittedly, it was a humbling experience, but it taught
me volumes, especially about myself, about others, about
forgiveness, compassion, and most importantly - love.
It's not about finding the "perfect" or "true" Orthodox Church,
its about living, being that "living icon" of Christ, and going
through the stages of spiritual life: purification, illumination,
and perfection. I will most likely be in the purification stage,
all my life, but God willing, may I receive grace to be illumined
in this life,so that I may perceive clearly the things of God,
and not of man.

I would appreciate your prayers, and I will keep you in mine.

With humble bow,

Rd. Chrysostomos

[user_355]

Symeon,

This is my first post on this forum, I think I know how to do this..

We, in our small mission, have gone through the same frustration, anger, confusion, and (almost) despair.

We (5 of us, including austindoc (Nectarios)) went from ROCOR to ROAC to the Mathewites. Those were very trying times and very painful. I am amazed we stuck it out together! While the situation with Mathewite bishops is not perfect, we are at peace with our decision and have been with our priest and bishop for 2 years now.

What I learned from the experience is that there are no perfect synods. We are happy with our priest and bishop and at peace now. As Nectarios mentioned, look for the fruits of peace and brotherly love in a parish or priest and try to figure it all out from there. I am sure there are those who would say we are deluded and have strayed (including those in the new calendar churches...who accuse us of being schismatics), but who cares? We will continue to struggle as best we can and pray God will forgive our ignorance.

May God be with you in your search for understanding and a priest/parish. I know He will not abandon you if you are truly seeking Him.

mary
Exaltation of the Holy Cross
Austin, Tx

[Liudmilla]

With regard to the pharisaical approach of our Orthodox leaders....

Symeon,
I understand your situation and have been there myself. It is sad to see this in our church leaders. The very men who proport to be our "spiritual" fathers. It seems that our spiritual welfare is less important than ambition, power, and greed. Brings to mind a bit of that Jim Jones feeling.

My husband and I were discussing this topic today. Funny how there is so much devoted in the New Testament to that pharisaical attitude, while so little is given to ....say the 40 days, which is so pivotal in Orthodox theology. We came to the conclusion that so much was devoted to the theme of the pharisaical because Christ was trying to warn the church of the very real dangers of this problem. Yet we as a church seem to have ignored the warnings and today find ourselves in the same pit as the pharisees found themselves in. All the same intrigue, power struggles, theology disputes and greed that infused the Jewish religion can be found in Orthodoxy, but not just Orthodoxy. I think in all churches, tody, in some degree or another.

Ultimately, faith in Christ, His Father and all they taught is not the same as religion. The first is belief, while the second is an institution. It is not the faith that has the problems, but the institution.

Don't let the deeds of a few determine things for you, but as suggested above, find a parish (if possible) where the Orthodox children still practice Orthox love and charity. God will judge you on your actions and not the actions of men greedy for power.

Milla