I mean this in pure humor and have no intention of making someone upset.
Q: How many Old Calandrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. they use pure beeswax candles.
Q: How many Old Believers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Change? CHANGE?! whata you mean CHANGE?!?!?!?!
Nicholas Zollars