Evfimy,
No, it shows you have never experienced the grace of the Holy Spirit. As Father Seraphim said, a persons develops a sense of what is Orthodox and what is not.
From everything you have written here, YOU show that YOU do not have a sense of what is Orthodox. You talk about converting to papism, "traditional" papism; that, BTW, is an oxy-moron.
You question why God allowed such things to happen with Ephraim; what a simple view. Why did He allow it? Because He gave free will. Of course, He sees what we will do and He sees what we are at our deaths. But, the course of life is up to our free will. God already knows if we will be saved or not. It's our feeble lives that have to endure this slow timeline.
God has already won the victory at the end of time. It's in Revelations. Have you read it? We know how it's going to end. Let me give you a hint...satan loses.
Why would He take Grace away from one that had it before...because they turned from Him. God knows what will happen, but don't you think that He sent them messages to reconsider? But, by their own will and stubborness and lack of faith, they still turned from Him. If Adam could turn from Him, how much easier for the generations to come?
Why would the Theotokos say that she will be with Mt. Athos, always, and now that most are heretics...because one day she WILL leave. For the sake of the few that are still there, she is still with them. But, one day she WILL leave.
I have been Orthodox for years. I know what grace is and is not.
If you cannot see the arrogance in this statement, then you are already quite deep in it. Are you a saint? Are you one of the Apostles or any of the saints that have the right to say that? How can you make a statement like that at the equal level of the saints who lived in daily communion with God.
YOU are talking about going with the papists...and then you equal yourself to the saints who truely did LIVE in the Holy Spirit?
Brother, you are lost. Try to find your way back.
And you have a total papist mis-conception about St. Ignatius Brianchaninov. You do realize why the papists didn't like him, don't you? He refuted many of their lies. Look it up.
It looks like you took one step forward and 10 steps back. You are in a worse place then you started...because now you have the knowledge of the teachings of Orthodoxy and you reject it.