JamesR wrote:I mostly just want answers to my deepest longings and questions. So many spiritual doubts and questions plague my mind every day, and oftentimes my Priest takes forever to answer them or I have trouble accepting his answers. For starters, I still don't get why there is so much evil in the world and why we have to suffer, why the Church has done so much evil in its past if it's supposed to be the pillar and ground of the truth and why God won't talk to me and how I'm supposed to know if Orthodoxy is the true religion or not. I mean, I feel like it's a somewhat noble desire. I don't really care for wealth or power or money. Everyone here seems to be advising me against the thought of even considering getting involved with the Devil, but why not? If God isn't answering me then who else do I have? I feel like I'm at the point where nothing short of a miraculous Divine experience of seeing or hearing God myself and receiving answers could save me. But I don't get anything. I just want the Devil to answer the questions for me that God doesn't seem to be answering. I don't know what I could give him, but I'd give anything for answers.
I mostly just want answers to my deepest longings and questions.
Have you ever read the Confessions of St. Augustine? St. Augustine wrote that our souls will not be at peace until they rest in Christ as Christ is the source of our life and light. He alone will satisfy our deepest longings and answer all our questions.
You must realize that once you have seriously entertained the thought of embracing the devil, you are already in serious danger. Please contact your priest and follow his advice.
Repeat: do not have anything to do with the devil. Even reading about him in fictional works can be deadly for your soul.