While I am no fan of the tragedy known as "Uniatism", I have to say that while it is for all of the wrong reasons, the users on that forum have been correct in observing the problematic nature of your personal beliefs and the "church" you're intent on joining. You believe the EP to be heretical, yet you're going to join a 'church' which not only is in communion with him, but in fact is institutionally even further along in the ecumenist agenda, in that it has actually established communion with the Monophysites.
Your attitude towards the holy mysteries also strikes me as that of a vagante - your basic plan (if I'm getting this correctly) is to take the baptism of the Antiochians, take the ministrations of "worldly Orthodoxy"'s clerics when "necessity" demands it, but as soon as you can basically ditch all of these entirely to join the Cyprianites. This entire outlook sounds like the vagantes, who believe "valid sacraments" are like chattle that can be taken hold of and transferred irregardless of ecclessial boundaries.
I noticed you said, besides possibly the Cyprianites, you'd consider joining the GOC of "Archbishop Chrysostom". Do you mean Chrysostmos the II, Archbishop of Athens? This is OOD's Church. If so, you're describing a group whose beliefs and ecclessiology is indistinguishable from that of ROAC The zealot monks on Mt.Athos who actually act consistantly with their beliefs, are also members of this Church.
I also noticed you once again could not resist a chance to bash the ROAC. "Conspiracy theorist"? It seems to be that the only thing which differentiates your views on "world Orthodoxy" and that of the "conspiracy theorists", is that theirs is consistant, yours is waivering.
I know the temptation you endure in your search - the possibility of being estranged from a regular liturgical life in a Church for long periods of time, the lack of "at least one Church in every major city". But what worth are prayers said in impiety? Particularly by someone who knows better, who knows his leaders and many of his co-religionists are either heretics, or communers of heresy?
Seraphim
